I love finding new blogs to read and getting to know other bloggers on Twitter. Especially bloggers similar to myself. But there’s a part of me that feels intimidated by other bloggers.
I’m not normally a shy person. I could spark up on a conversation with almost anyone. But I’m easily intimidated, and I always have been.
Okay, don’t laugh, but there’s a boy in my class at college who terrifies me. There’s no reason why, he just does! I think we’ve spoken to each other twice before and only very briefly. He’s never done anything bad to me, he just intimidates me.
Sometimes during chats on Twitter I’ll send a tweet to a blogger that I haven’t spoken to before. Most of the time I’ll get a friendly response which is lovely. But it’s the times when I don’t get any response at all that bother me.
If it’s a big blogger with thousands of followers then I’ll feel kinda silly, like I shouldn’t have sent the tweet in the first place. If it’s a blogger with maybe 400 or 500 followers then I’ll be paranoid that I’ve offended them somehow.
Numbers in particular intimidate me. If I see a blogger with thousands of followers on my timeline then I’ll look at them differently to a blogger with a few hundred followers.
I don’t know about you, but when I was in primary school I used to look up at the big kids in the years above me and wish I could be like them one day. I used to wonder what it felt like to be in the older years. I’d never dream of speaking to the older kids but I always admired them from a distance.
Well, to me, when I look at a big blogger it’s like looking up at the older kids in primary school.
I’ve only been blogging since January but some bloggers have been blogging for years! They know other bloggers and they consider some bloggers their close friends. Sometimes I find it difficult to get my voice heard. It’s always hard to find a place in an already established group.
I don’t want to offend anyone because I’m not a bad person and I would never upset anyone intentionally. Plus I guess a part of me knows that bloggers are friends with other bloggers. So if I offend one blogger, four or five of their blogger friends might also dislike me too.
Now I’m not the type of person who desperately needs to be liked by everyone, but it’s nice to be liked. I’d much rather someone liked me than disliked me and I’m sure most people, if not all, would agree with me on that.
It’s especially important in the blogging community. Small bloggers like me need a little extra help and advice every now and then. Plus it’s useful to make connections with other bloggers in the community so we can support and promote each other’s blogs.
I’m not afraid of honesty. If I ask for an opinion on something I want an honest answer! I can accept constructive criticism. But there’s a fine line between honest, constructive criticism and rude comments.
Also, it might sound silly, but I’m kinda paranoid about my age too! I’m nineteen and I don’t feel young but I’m a few years younger than some of my favourite bloggers. I know some people judge others on their age, whether they know them or not. I don’t want anyone to get the wrong impression of me.
During my time in the blogging community I’ve seen highs and I’ve seen some lows. There’s often disagreements on my Twitter timeline, and they’re not always friendly. I’d hate to be the blogger that gets dragged into something or misunderstood. It’s happened to me once, and I hope never again.
I work very hard on my blog and I’d hate for my reputation to be damaged because of a disagreement or misunderstanding. Things can be easily misinterpreted online. Once the damage is done it can be difficult to rebuild a broken reputation.
Plus, when disagreements take place in such a public way other people will have their opinions too. Not just the people involved and their close friends, but other bloggers watching from a distance.
I know I’m an anxious person and some of my fears are probably completely unnecessary. However, I know for sure that I’m not 100% unreasonable all of the time.
I need your help though. Let me know in the comments whether you can relate to my fears. Am I being silly or realistic? Please be honest with me, and let me know how you feel too!