I recently read a post that I disagreed with. I got to the bottom and someone had left a comment. They also disagreed with the post, but the difference was that they had the guts to voice their opinion about it.
I thought to myself woah, that’s brave. I’d never do that. I almost judged her in a way for expressing her opinion but that girl had every right to say how she felt and she wasn’t being rude about it at all.
I’ll go to parties I don’t want to go to and meet up with friends I don’t like anymore just because I’m too afraid to say no and hurt their feelings when really it’d probably be easier for everyone if I was just honest about it.
If someone says something wrong or gets something mixed up I won’t correct them because that might offend them. They’d probably appreciate it if I did correct them because then they’ll know in future, but I’m too scared of upsetting them.
The thing is, I want to be liked. I’m a people pleaser. And I’m afraid that by disagreeing with someone or expressing a controversial opinion I might upset someone and I don’t want to do that.
Since I started struggling with my anxiety around 18 months ago a lot of things I’ve always done that I just thought was a part of me have started to make more sense. I can link a lot of my personality traits to my anxiety and I think this is one of them.
All throughout primary school, secondary school and college I’ve always been afraid to ask for help. Even now in my full time apprenticeship I still struggle to ask for help but when I have to I’ll put it off for as long as possible until I’m in panic mode. I don’t want to ask because I don’t want to bother anyone, they’re probably too busy and I wouldn’t want to stress them out or irritate them.
Like I say, this is probably down to my anxiety and part of me that’ll probably always be there. I’ve always been like it so I doubt I’ll change, no matter how much I want to.
Let me know how you feel about expressing your opinions and feelings. Is it something that comes naturally to you or do you shy away like me? Also how does it make you feel when someone disagrees with something you do or say?